Love to Hate You Page 9

  He laughed as he pulled my hands away from my face.

  “I’m tired of this, Jackie. I’m tired of playing games to get more time with you. Let me take you out to dinner.”

  “As in a date?” I asked.

  “Yes, a date, next Saturday.”

  “Next Saturday? You’ve been stalking me for months and now you want to wait over a week?”

  He grinned and laughed softly.

  “I have to go away next week. There’s an environmental conference I’m attending in Geneva. Why don’t you come with me?”

  “To Geneva?”

  It took me by surprise, but I couldn't imagine wanting to do anything more. I could get away from the ghost of Marc, from the ever-present Dennis, and maybe start on my future with Brent. But just as I was going to say yes, I remembered I had booked myself solid with work. Not only that, but I had finals that week.

  “I wish I could go, but I can’t. With work and finals, I can’t do it,” I said.

  Disappointment flashed across his face.

  “Then promise you’ll join me for dinner when I get back,” he said. “Then after dinner I want to show you off as my date at the Boone Christmas party. What do you say?”

  I didn’t need to think about it. My head was nodding before the word came out of my mouth.

  “Yes.”

  Chapter Fifteen

  Jackie

  As I stared into my closet I realized I had nothing to wear for my date with Brent. Sure, the closet was packed tight and there were things in there that hadn’t seen the light of day in a long time, but tonight was a big deal. Tonight I was going on my first date in years.

  I grabbed my bag and headed straight for the door. It was just past noon so I had enough time to get to the mall for an hour and then get back and get ready.

  “Where are you going?” Dennis asked as he looked up from a magazine.

  I sighed as I stopped in the doorway. Why didn’t I kick him out? Why was I always being so nice to him? He didn’t deserve it at all.

  “I’m going to the mall,” I said. “I have a date tonight so I’d appreciate it if you disappeared.”

  He set the magazine down on the coffee table.

  “Mind if I tag along?” he asked. “I won’t get in your way, I just need to pick up a new pair of jeans.”

  “Fine,” I said, not wanting any more delays. “Just hurry up. I don’t have a lot of time.”

  “Okay, okay,” he said, holding up his hands as if he was at gunpoint.

  He got up and grabbed his wallet off the table as I stepped out the door.

  Dennis snorted softly as we reached my new car. Out of the corner of my eye I saw his face squish into a pained look.

  “You don’t have to come with me, you know,” I said.

  “No, no, I really need a new pair of jeans.”

  “You made a face,” I said.

  “I had something caught in my throat,” he said.

  He made a similar sound to his snort several times as he cleared his throat.

  “Asshole,” I said under my breath as I unlocked the car.

  We drove in silence to the mall. There was more traffic on the roads than I expected so I kept looking at the clock and ticking down in my head how much time I had before I needed to get back home.

  I wished I was alone. I regretted having him tag along, but I didn’t want to hear him complain about my leaving him behind. I was also hopeful that if I was nice to him, he would be nice back by going out tonight.

  “I was thinking that maybe you should buy an air bed or something. Your couch isn’t very comfortable,” he said.

  “It’s not meant to be slept on,” I said. “Shouldn’t your apartment be ready by now?”

  “I’ve been meaning to talk to you about that,” he said. “You know they were painting my place, well they decided to renovate the whole building and then sell it. I need to find a new place to live.”

  “So then find one,” I said as I pulled into the mall’s parking garage.

  I was tired of all his excuses. He needed to get out of my apartment.

  “I was thinking maybe I should buy something. We make a good team and--”

  “Don’t even finish that thought. I don’t want to hear it,” I said.

  I parked the car and hurried towards the entrance. Dennis rushed to catch up with me, but I wasn’t in the mood. I was there for one purpose--to find the cutest thing possible to wear tonight.

  “Let me finish,” he said. “We could buy a place together and the mortgage will save us money instead of us paying rent separately.”

  “Have you lost your mind? I don’t want to buy a house with you. I don’t want to live with you either. I only let you stay with me because you don’t have anywhere else to go.”

  Even as I said it, I began to question it. Dennis always had a lot of friends. And even though he hadn’t said anything about his dating, I knew it wasn’t like him to be alone for as long as he had been.

  He followed me through the department store and into the mall.

  “Why are you following me? I thought you needed to get jeans,” I said.

  He winced and raised his eyebrows at me. I hated acting like a bitch, but Dennis deserved it.

  Oh no, now he’s going to make me feel guilty. Don’t do it, Jackie. Don’t do it!

  “There’s a new style I want to try on,” he said. “I need your opinion on how they look.”

  “Are you kidding me?”

  “I promise it won’t take long,” he said, his eyes pleading with me.

  Don’t do it!

  “Just one pair?” I asked.

  “Just one. I swear,” he said. “I know you don’t have a lot of time.”

  Sighing, I looked at the stores surrounding us. Dennis’s favorite store was on the way to Torque, my favorite clothing store. Despite how much I wanted to, I couldn’t say no. I was too nice. Sometimes I hated myself for that.

  “Alright, fine,” I said. “But just one pair.”

  We entered the store and Dennis went straight for the wall with its shelves of jeans. I wandered over to a circular rack with shirts hanging on it and checked the time.

  Forty-five minutes.

  Dennis took a small stack of jeans into the dressing room. A minute later he stepped out in one of the jeans and walked to the three way mirror.

  “What do you think?” he asked.

  I glanced at his jeans.

  “They look fine,” I said.

  “It looks like I don’t have an ass. They look baggy back there.”

  “Are you serious?”

  “See?” he asks.

  He tugs the seat of the jeans and I nod. He was right, the jeans were baggy.

  “Gimme a sec to try on another pair,” he said.

  Before I could answer he disappeared into the dressing room again. After a minute he stepped out in a pair of really faded jeans.

  “These look like something out of the eighties,” he said. “I have another pair to try.”

  Sighing, I looked at my watch again as he changed. How did ten minutes pass?

  “Dennis,” I said as I knocked on his door, “We have to leave in half an hour. I’m going to the store.”

  He opened the door and stepped out in another pair of jeans that fit perfectly.

  “No, wait,” he said. “I think these are it, but the denim is kinda thin.” He waved over a petite blonde with french braids who was behind the cash register. “Do you have this fit in another style?”

  She looked at the tags and nodded. “We do. They should be on the wall.”

  “I grabbed all the jeans in my size,” he said.

  “Let me check in the back,” she said. “If anyone asks, tell them Molly is helping you.”

  As she walked away, Dennis started roaming the store. I was beginning to really lose my patience. I looked at the time and shook my leg nervously as Dennis wandered.

  “I’m going to get going,” I said.

  “T
his will only be a minute,” he said. “Just be patient.”

  “No, I’m running out of time. I need something for tonight. I came here for me, not you.”

  “Selfish much?” He turned around and started to look at some other clothing. “They have a women’s section here. Why don’t you look while I’m waiting on my jeans?”

  “You know this store doesn’t fit me right,” I said. “It’s like they think women should be built without any curves at all. Plus this place just isn’t me.”

  I looked around the store to see if Molly was looking for us, but I didn’t see her.

  Where’d she go?

  I didn’t know why I stayed in that store. I should have left and gone shopping on my own, but I didn’t. I hated that Dennis knew me so well that he knew I wouldn’t leave.

  When Molly came back she threw her hands up and shook her head.

  “We’re all out. Do you want me to check another store?” she asked as she returned to the register.

  “That would be great,” Dennis said with a smile.

  I joined him at the register and tapped my foot impatiently.

  Twenty minutes.

  I still had enough time to find something, just not as much time as I wanted.

  “Oh they have your size at Fashion Plaza,” she said. “Do you want me to put them on hold for you?”

  “That’s only ten minutes from here,” Dennis said. “We can make it.”

  “No we can’t,” I said. “You can go back out if you want to.”

  “On Christmas Eve? By myself?”

  He tilted his head to the side like he always did when he wanted me to feel bad, but it didn’t work this time.

  “I have a date tonight,” I said, trying to not shriek. “I came here to buy myself something new. I didn’t come here to get you new jeans.”

  “Umm excuse me,” Molly said. “I couldn’t help but overhear. I don’t know which store you were going to, but some of the stores are closing early tonight.”

  My eyes widened as her words sunk in. I knew my luck and thinking about Torque being closed made me want to wring Dennis’s neck even more.

  Without a word, I left the store and continued down towards Torque. I only had ten minutes, but it was enough time to find a few things and buy them. I’d figure everything else out at home.

  As I approached the store, I could already see the large glass doors being pulled shut. I stopped and just stared at the store, seeing a few things on the mannequins that would have been perfect.

  Fuck! Just my luck.

  Dennis stood beside me.

  “Oh hey, that sucks,” he said. “I’m sorry.”

  After glaring at him I started to walk back towards the parking garage. I was in such a bad mood I just wanted to get out of the mall and get back home. I didn’t have time to race around the mall trying to find open stores for a new outfit.

  As I merged onto the freeway, my stomach dropped. Every lane was backed up. Traffic wasn’t going anywhere.

  “Guess there was an accident,” Dennis said.

  I’m never making it home on time now.

  * * *

  Stuck in traffic, I kept looking at the time as I silently counted down when Brent would pick me up for dinner. I wanted to call him and let him know I was running late, but with Dennis sitting next to me I couldn’t. I didn’t want him hearing me on the phone while I spoke to Brent. I’d have to wait until I got home.

  I got home with fifteen minutes to spare. I ran into the apartment and took the quickest shower of my life. As much as I didn’t want Dennis there in the beginning, I was a little glad he was there now. He could answer the door when Brent came while I finished getting ready.

  As I swept the blush brush onto the apples of my cheeks, I checked my phone. Brent was ten minutes late. I was disappointed but relieved at the same time. If he was late, that meant I wasn’t.

  Finally looking at myself in the mirror, I thought I looked pretty good. All that rushing had helped give my skin a nice glow and for whatever reason, my hair was looking really good.

  I left my bedroom and found Dennis sitting on the couch, flipping through the channels. He reeked of smoke.

  “Were you outside?” I asked.

  He groaned. “I told you I don’t smoke in here.”

  “No, thats not what I meant. You don’t need to be so defensive.”

  “You bring it out in me,” he said.

  Please just stop, I thought.

  “I don’t want to fight,” I said. “I was just curious if you went for a walk or something.”

  He glanced over at me and then back at the television.

  “You didn’t miss him,” he said. “He hasn’t shown up.”

  Ouch.

  “Oh,” I said. “Okay, thanks.”

  “You’d might as well sit down,” he said. “You might be waiting a while.”

  “What’s that supposed to mean?” I asked, trying to keep the anger out of my voice.

  “Nothing,” he said with a shrug.

  I sat on the couch and waited for Brent to come. I watched as the time ticked by painfully slowly. Why it couldn’t move this slow when I was shopping, I didn't know. Now I wished it would speed up so Brent and I could go out.

  I checked my phone for any new texts and any calls I didn’t see come through, but nothing came. Once he was thirty minutes late, I checked the traffic to see if it was still bad, but it had cleared. There was no reason for Brent to not be there.

  My brain spun as I thought of excuses for him.

  He had an accident.

  There’s a family emergency.

  He got a flat tire.

  He’s standing me up.

  I hugged myself as I thought about the last one. I wanted to shove it away in the dark closet in the back of my head, but I couldn’t.

  The remembered pain of what I went through with Marc was still too close to the surface. But this felt even worse.

  Brent knows what I went through with that. How could he do this to me? Why?

  I grabbed my favorite sweater from the closet and stepped outside. The cool air snapped me out of the moment. He had to have a reason.

  As I pulled open his contact information, my finger hovered over his name. I was going to call him and find out what happened. I wasn’t going to let him treat me like this.

  But I couldn’t do it. I couldn’t call him. I was afraid of what he would say. In the back of my mind I thought about how he used to hate me. How he hated me so much that he brought a date to Samantha’s dinner. He had to know she was setting us up.

  Maybe he still hated me. Maybe he was so cruel that he wanted to really hurt me. But why?

  When I thought of our time together the past couple of months, none of it made any sense to me.

  The door to my apartment opened and Dennis leaned against the doorway.

  “Let’s go get a drink,” he said.

  It was Christmas Eve and Brent wasn’t coming. The last thing I wanted was to sit at home thinking about that.

  * * *

  Dennis drove to a new bar in downtown Canyon Cove. We entered a large open room with tables, chairs, and intimate booths in the corners. Every seat was taken. I thought people would be home with their families, but the bar was surprisingly crowded. A couple rose from their table as we walked past.

  “We’re heading out,” the woman said as she touched my sleeve. “You can sit here.”

  “Thanks,” I said.

  As I squeezed between the tables to get to the empty seat, Dennis sat down on a wood chair. He surveyed the room and then his hand went up. A pretty waitress with braces on her teeth smiled as she walked over with a small drink tray.

  “I’ll have a vodka cranberry,” he said, then pointed to me. “And she’ll have a margarita on the rocks, no salt.”

  I nodded. I didn’t drink much, but when I did margaritas were my favorite.

  Hoping to hear something from Brent, I pulled my phone out to check it again. Sti
ll nothing.

  “He’s not going to call,” Dennis said.

  “How would you know?” I asked.

  “Because I wouldn’t,” he said. “I guess he got what he wanted from you. Be glad, not many women get a car in exchange.”

  “And that right there is why we’re never getting back together,” I said.

  “You’re going to bring this up now?”

  “Why do you always have to do that? Why do you always have to take the knife and twist it? Like I’m not feeling bad enough?”

  “Oh here we go again,” he said. “You’re always reading into everything I say.”

  “I am? Then how else should I take that?” I asked.

  The waitress put our drinks down and disappeared. I stirred my drink, stabbing at the ice cubes, while I waited for Dennis’s response.

  “Well?” I asked.

  “Jeez, calm down. Just forget I said anything.”

  I was about to tear into him more when a man in a black suit with blond hair caught my eye. Brent was standing at the bar talking to his friend Gunnar Craven. I really did have the worst luck.

  Of all the places Dennis could’ve taken me, he takes me to the same one Brent is at.

  “Guess I can cross off accident and family emergency,” I said.

  “What?” Dennis said. “I didn't hear you.”

  “Nothing, forget about it,” I said, unable to stop staring at Brent.

  Dennis followed my gaze.

  “Is that him?” he asked. “Do you want to go somewhere else?”

  “I’m fine.”

  I said the words more to myself than to Dennis. Despite how upset I was, despite how much my blood sped up in my veins and despite my nervous habit of wringing my hands being on full display, I knew I would be alright. I didn’t need to run away.

  * * *

  Dennis kept the drinks coming. I was deep into my third margarita, still watching Brent, when my margarita induced courage reared its head.

  “I’m going over there,” I said, slurring my words. “I’m going to give that asshole a piece of my pie. I mean mind. A piece of my mind.”

  Dennis laughed. “Now, now, Jackie. You know that’s just the tequila talking. Maybe I should get you home.”